The Norwegian Nobel Committee has announced it will award Sydney Sweeney with the 2025 Nobel Peace Prize after she was able to finallyunite two diametrically opposed groups over a common issue.

Sydney Sweeney broke the internet last week (albeit not in the way she had maybe hoped) when her American Eagle ads came under fire for seemingly pushing Nazi propaganda. The campaign has the blonde haired blue eyed actress claiming she has “good genes”, a play on the denim outfit she is seen wearing.

Both Bluesky and X had a field day with this, and the outrage doesn’t seem to be dying out.

“What did that bitch just say? Man, that’s awful”, said Linda Caballero, a self described “commie baddie”, after being shown the campaign.

“What did that bitch just say? Man, that’s based for a girl”, said Karl K. Kensington, a self described “alt-right randyman”, after being shown the campaign.

While the hate from the left is relatively new, incels have been seething over Sweeney’s success ever since she arrived on the scene. This used to be a point of contention between the two sides, but ever since the ad and subsequent revelation that Sweeney is a registered republican, they have been almost friendly with each other and competing over who can find the most creative way of calling her a butterface.

The Norwegian Nobel Committee was so blown away by this sudden truce that they decided to forgo the normal process of selection and just give her the prize effective immediately. One member of the committee was even quoted as saying “Shit that’s all you, slime.”

Internal documents show that the award almost went to the chemical Red 40 for uniting hippie helicopter moms and MAGA mama bears but the reaction to these ads was so strong the committee immediately forgot about that.

Whatever the case, we’re sure that if she does another movie with Glenn Powell, everyone will go back to creaming their racist jeans.

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