He’s done it again. Local shit-for-brains Hector Zuniga smoked weed again for the first time in a month thinking he would know his limit this time, and now he’s bundled up on his couch wondering what he could have done to upset his next door neighbor (He didn’t do anything and they like him).
We learned from his friends that this is his monthly routine, despite the fact that they always remind him this is what happens. “It’s once a month at this point. We each have a pre-typed out text telling him we’re not mad and we still like him since we know he’ll always ask at least one of us” explained Hezekiah Green, his best friend from 5th grade that he hasn’t seen in over 15 years.
We tried to interview him but when we knocked on the door we heard a girlish shriek and what sounded like a bedroom door slamming. When we started leaving a car pulled in behind us, which turned out to be an delivery driver dropping off some dippin dots, a pedialyte, and a pack of pokemon cards.
We’ll follow up with him in about a week when he does his monthly “I’m going to get back in shape” workout too.
The Weakling Gazette 
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